I spent more than the first half of my life fighting to not become the traditional soccer mom. I tried to move away from the small town I grew up in. I always said I would just make enough money to hire help to cook and clean for me. I fought because I was tired of seeing girls pregnant all too young, which was always a death sentence. Any hope of finishing school was gone; any desire to travel was squashed; any new adventures permanently put on hold. I knew that was not the life for me. I always knew I wasn't meant to have kids. I don't coo when I hold a baby: I never have.
But my parents and grandma refused to raise a child, male or female, that did not know how to cook, clean, and do basic repairs. My grandma was a seamstress for a time and taught me to sew and knit, even though I was TERRIBLE at both. I was a tomboy. I wanted to be outside on my bike or playing soccer or climbing trees or reading a book or writing a letter, so I fought these things.
But what I failed to recognize was that just because I don't want kids, I can still partake of the domestic arts. Not to mention that living in the US, it's pretty costly to have hired help. And it really is a different world. I know more couples with a father that stays at home with the kids than the mother, and they do a fantastic job.
The problem I have now is not being mistaken for a crazy cat lady. I have cats, but I just sorted of "ended up" with them. They were old when they were dropped off, so they're pretty low key. I have a live-in boyfriend, who has been staying home since he got laid off. He does the majority of the cleaning. Well, he does a lot of the cleaning. He does some of the cleaning. We're working on it. Really, he does keep up with me because I'm the kind of person who is a cyclone of messes that always moves things and buys new things for projects and has no where to store any of it. And we live in my grandma's condo (she died a few years ago).
So I'm back in the small town I grew up in. I live a quiet domestic life with a long-term partner and two giant cats. We don't go out every night. We traveled before he got laid off, and we will again soon. For fun, I knit, crochet, sew, bake, cook, and take belly dancing classes. I have a yoga habit, which I'm sure my friends are sick of trying to get talked into. I have a beautiful Trek WSD 7000 complete with rack and basket. I even ride it to the grocery store if I don't need too much. I've become almost everything I've tried to avoid becoming. Maybe even worse since I don't even have the excuse of getting knocked up to get here. At least I lived before I got sucked back.
We're not traditional or boring. We play a lot of video games. We're kind of nerdy honestly. But I've come to accept that there are some things you just can't fight.
